Me.

Just being me trying to survive this world like everyone else. It has been awhile since I have wrote in this blog.

Let’s see. I want to say this may be the best part of my journey. I always use to think that I was truly happy and maybe I was at a time.

However, I have never felt like I have now. So mentally happy. I certainly still have my days but I can tell I am healing. I can tell that whatever I am doing during the day, or the people I surround my self with is really working.

My dreams are usually negative and I have many nightmares. I never stick up for myself in my dreams. They are always interpreting my fears or what I worry about in the day and make it worse in my dreams. Now, I actually voice my opinion in my dreams and don’t let most people run over me in them. I am less scared. Gosh, you have no idea how amazing that feeling is. To conquer your fears in your dreams our things you are subconscious about.

Not only that, times when I feel like I am going into emotional relapse, I surprise myself. I recover so much faster and easier. Even if I feel at that time that I will sink right back in to the old me, I prove myself wrong. That is another huge great feeling.

Happy Note: I am super super happy about I have set up my apartment 🙂 I have my art posted every where on the walls. I have two paintings that I am currently working on in there. I finally have set up my balcony the way I want it! I am going to try and start writing more. I feel a relief when I do even though I know my writing will be judged, but then again I don’t care.

I am just writing to release and for anyone who would like to read.

I get my tonsils out October 29th. Super excited to finally get them out. It has been a long time coming.

I am currently starting the process of applying to graduate school. Super exciting that I am finally at this point. Asking for my references, getting artwork together and my artist statement.

My sculptures are really coming along. I am so damn excited for my life! There are many many many obstacles at this moment. But you know what? I am going to get through them.

Oh, I am totally typing this while in the laundry mat. It is super relaxing to me. Also, it makes me super happy to wash clothes so early on the weekend so that I can enjoy and rest the rest of my weekend.

So many people say I work too hard, I deserve rest. I will rest when I finally feel successful in what I am doing. I have to have that feeling before I rest. Surprisingly, that is this weekend 🙂

Everyone, have a blessed day. Know that you are important. Know that your past does not define you. Know that people love you. Know that YOU WILL SURVIVE!

Alright, Alright, Alright. Looks like I have had two views so far. Woot woot! May only be by default 😉 .

This week was probably one of the longest weeks ever. School started back up so I have been pretty busy with both work and school. I love it though, keeping yourself busy, stalls your mind from thinking of other things. However, my body is not too excited about the recent changes of what I am doing! 😀

Let me start with a good thing that has happend for me this week. I lost inspiration of pursuing my art this summer due to lovely boulders in life sticking themselves out in the road. I could not wait to get back to school.

The Art community within UT Tyler has been very eliberating and healing to me.

I basically talk with everyone, no matter if they are quiet or loud. So when they came in while I was working, they all said hi and gave me a hug. I can not tell you how much I love connection and the art community. I have never felt so comfortable in a group before as I have with my art friends.

Not only that, but I have gained my inspiration or light from what i want to do with Art and why I do it. About damn time! I hate that I lose things within myself because of other people. Again,that is something I am working on. Something I will continue to work and focus on. Going back to school was something I have desperately needed. To feel apart of something greater is a strong emotion.

Anywho, this weekend is going to be a great weekend. I will tell you about it next week 😉 Feel free to tell me how your week was in the comments and I will give you a pep talk 🙂

Inspirational Quote:

“We must keep going, if not, won’t our life just stop and start to become less interesting?”

-Teresa Young